The Iguana Story

It was a story that seemed like it was pulled straight out of "Florida Man memes".  But it happened in my hometown.  A man was arrested in a local restaurant after getting into a fight with the manager and, of all things, pulling a two-foot long iguana out of the front of his shirt and swinging it around by the tail like a pair of nunchucks.  Naturally, I thought this story was hilarious, and forwarded it to my friends.  Later that day I saw another post from the police department, and there was a face and a name to go with the story.  Then it got a little less funny.

The man they arrested, the man who was being described in Facebook comments as a "crackhead" and a "low life", was a man I had met a few days previously in our soup kitchen at church.  He came in during coffee hour with a pre-teen boy and started eating our post-church treats that are usually reserved for, well, people who attend church.  I was running around hurriedly trying to get ready to serve our community meal with a smaller-than-expected team of volunteers, when I got a brilliant idea.

Often, when our volunteer teams are short-staffed, our diners are happy to help with serving and cleaning up the meal that they are enjoying.  I decided to ask this gentleman and the boy with him if they would be willing to help us out.  The boy agreed, but the man seemed rather... out of it.  I thought "ok, maybe this wasn't such a great idea."  But after a cup of coffee or two he seemed more alert, and he and the boy were helping serve drinks and desserts.  I asked the man his name and he said "Brother Teeter" and identified himself as a minister.  He made for an interesting image of a minister, wearing a t-shirt that said "Shoot your local heroin dealer" in large letters on the back.  But he would smile at me whenever I made eye contact with him after that.

The infamous iguana, "Copper", in a picture from the Painesville Police Department


It's really not a good idea to read the comments section on any website if you want to retain your faith in humanity.  Sometimes it's like a weird form of entertainment, as if the news story and the subsequent comments are a form of "reality TV" that was made just for us to watch and laugh at.  I'm guilty of occasionally indulging in this form of entertainment.  Sometimes the comments are witty, sometimes they're just over the top or stupid, but no matter what, I doubt that those people commenting have ever made eye contact with or spoken with the person they are making fun of. 

Just to be crystal clear, I don't condone animal cruelty.  That poor iguana suffered "a leg bone fracture, metabolic bone disease and poor body condition. It was also noted that she was missing part of her tail."  Clearly, she deserves a home where she can be cared for by someone who is up for the job.  But when I see people commenting on how that poor creature was abused by a "piece of trash", I wonder who thinks about the poor creature who owned her?  It's easy to paint a story like this as a cute animal being abused by an evil villain.  Real life is always more complicated than that.  God made both the human and the animal.  Both are loved by God.

I also don't want to seem like I condone bad behavior.  If I were a witness to such a situation, I would call the police too.  What I don't ever want to condone, however, is dehumanizing behavior.  People aren't objects to be used for our entertainment.  And I don't think any human being should be written off as a piece of trash.  Plus, with comments like "this is why Painesville can't have nice things", my whole town gets written off rather than just one person. 

Ok, maybe I shouldn't take this too seriously.  People usually warn you not to read the comments for a reason.  But maybe we need to learn how to watch our words.  Maybe the attitude of not taking comments seriously is part of the problem.  We forget that our tongues can be "a restless evil, full of deadly poison.  With it we bless the Lord and Father, and with it we curse men, who are made in the likeness of God." (James 3:8-9, RSV)

I think the lesson of "the iguana story", for me, is that I need to be more careful.  More thoughtful.  It might make me sound like a killjoy.  I know some of my friends have been labelled "feminist killjoys" for calling out racist and sexist jokes.  Whose "joy" is being "killed" here?  Those who are comfortable enough to sit back and laugh at someone else's expense.  A pattern of dehumanizing certain people leads to serious consequences.  People who comment on these stories will sometimes talk about "what they'd like to do" to the person who committed a crime.  They fantasize about inflicting bodily harm on someone that they have judged in their minds to be guilty.  I know I saw comments of that nature on the iguana story's post from the police department.

Tomorrow is Good Friday.  In writing this blog post, and thinking about this sacred triduum of days, I remember the story of a man who was judged by many people who barely knew him, who were glad to yell out "crucify him!" when asked what should be done with him.  Dehumanizing people has terrible consequences.

One more thing: I don't want to seem like I'm lecturing anyone.  Like I said, I laughed when I first heard the story too.  I mean, it is pretty ludicrous.  But when that story got matched up with a face and a name I realized it was no longer a funny anecdote.  I realized how much I am complicit in a society that dehumanizes and mocks people with mental issues, with addiction issues, with poverty... whatever else this man may have going on in his life.  These issues cause divisions between people, divisions that cause certain groups to be thought of as "less than".  I believe Christ stands on the side of those who are deemed "less than", since he once stood there himself.  Even before he stood there, he went to those people first in his ministry.

So, maybe the next time you're tempted to laugh at someone else, or write them off as a lost cause, try praying for them instead.  It may or may not change things for that person, but it will change your own heart.

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